E-mail to Real
Estate Mogul Tom Murphy
by William Kitcher
To: T. Murphy
– Fionn’s Real Estate Corporation
Cc: B. Greenizan – Acquisitions Regulatory
Commission
Subject: Hotel/Inn acquisition
Dear Tom,
It looks like we won’t be able to close as
expected on December 25 on that hotel/inn in
Bethlehem. It’s their busy season so they
don’t have any time for negotiations. In
fact, they’re so busy that they’re
completely full up with guests, and some crazy
couple from out of town want to stay there but
there’s no room. The management told this
couple that there’s no place to stay but
they’re insisting on it, so they’re
finding a place for them in the parking lot with
all the sheep and cows. The crazy lady said she
was impregnated by Jehovah so you know they’re
kind of weird.
We figured out what that awful smell was. 3
travelling salesmen (calling themselves Wise Guys
or something like that), stopped by and left some
presents for the aforementioned pregnant couple.
One of them left incense, one of them left myrrh
(which is apparently used in embalming so I don’t
know why that’s a gift for a baby) so those
were the causes of that awful smell. Fortunately,
the other Wise Guy left gold so that’ll help
the inn management in case this couple decide to
skip out on their bill.
The delay is also because, following December 25,
the inn is having some kind of festival –
lots of drummers, pipers, dancers, leaping lords,
etc. And there’s some kind of cow milking
competition with the local maids. They’ll
also have swans, geese, calling birds, French
hens, turtle doves, and partridges so the
festivities will be lively and no doubt even more
smelly.
So maybe we’ll be able to close the deal by
Easter. I’ll be in Calvary that weekend in
case you want together then to finalize
everything.
Regards,
Bill
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