How Lloyd Got
His Black Eye
by Don Drewniak
Friends of
mine, Lloyd and his wife Elizabeth, recently
celebrated their 60th anniversary after marrying
when they both were twenty-one.
A former
president of the United States once proclaimed
that “aging is not for the timid.”
Aging
ultimately takes a toll on just about every part
of one’s body, including hearing. If
research can be trusted, it applies to men more
than women.
There is,
however, one twist to the loss of hearing that
has been studied by Dr. Joseph Deafby and Dr.
Michael Earlost in an article entitled Selected
Frequency Loss in Senior Men published in
the May-June 2022 issue of The Journal of
Hearing. To simplify their findings, it
states that men who have been married to the same
woman for a protracted period of time become semi-immune
to their wife's vocal frequency. The result is
that their brain mistakes one or more words in a
sentence for similar sounding words.
The following
conversation was relayed to me by Lloyd regarding
his newly formed black eye.
Elizabeth:
“Lloyd, please empty the trash.”
Lloyd: “Give
me a few minutes to brush my teeth and use some
deodorant.
Elizabeth:
“What in heaven’s name for?”
Lloyd: “To
make me even more sexier than usual.”
Elizabeth:
“What in heaven's are you talking about?”
Lloyd: “Didn’t
you ask me if I wanted a piece of ass?”
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