Hey, Christmas
Hosts! It’s Figgy O’Clock!
by Brian Clark
We wish you a
merry Christmas,
We wish you a merry Christmas,
We wish you a merry Christmas,
And a happy new year.
Oh, bring us some figgy pudding,
Oh, bring us some figgy pudding,
Oh, bring us some figgy pudding,
And bring it right here.
We won’t go until we get some,
We won’t go until we get some,
We won’t go until we get some,
So bring it right here.
We have no figgy pudding,
We have no figgy pudding,
We have no figgy pudding,
We’re sorry about that.
That is so disappointing,
That is so disappointing,
That is so disappointing,
Why not whip some up now?
We don’t know how to make it,
We don’t know how to make it,
We don’t know how to make it,
I mean really, who does?
You could Google the recipe,
You could Google the recipe,
You could Google the recipe,
And then you’d know how.
It’s getting kind of late now,
It’s getting kind of late now,
It’s getting kind of late now,
Time for you to go.
Maybe we weren’t being clear,
Maybe we weren’t being clear,
Maybe we weren’t being clear,
WE WANT PUDDING NOW!
We don’t really even know you,
We don’t really even know you,
We don’t really even know you,
So why are you here?
We came here with the Johnsons,
We came here with the Johnsons,
We came here with the Johnsons,
They said come along.
Who the fuck are the Johnsons?
Who the fuck are the Johnsons?
Who the fuck are the Johnsons?
We have no idea.
It really doesn’t matter,
It really doesn’t matter,
It really doesn’t matter,
JUST FIGGY US NOW!
Get the hell out of our house now,
Get the hell out of our house now,
Get the hell out of our house now,
We’re calling the cops.
Maybe this will change your mind now,
Maybe this will change your mind now,
Maybe this will change your mind now,
About the whole pudding thing.
Where did you get the guns now?
Where did you get the guns now?
Where did you get the guns now?
Please put them away.
Then make some figgy pudding,
Then make some figgy pudding,
Then make some figgy pudding,
Just make it or die!
Come out now with your hands up,
Come out now with your hands up,
Come out now with your hands up,
Surrender right now!
We’ll take them to the
station,
We’ll take them to the station,
We’ll take them to the station,
And put them in jail.
What is it that they wanted?
What is it that they wanted?
What is it that they wanted?
These people with guns?
They wanted figgy pudding,
They wanted figgy pudding,
They wanted figgy pudding,
And they wouldn’t leave.
That sounds really good now,
That sounds really good now,
That sounds really good now,
Can we have some, too?
Oh Christ on a cracker!
Oh Christ on a cracker!
Oh Christ on a cracker!
Here we go again! |
|
