The fanatic extremists
With vitriolic spite
Put forth a lesser-known candidate
Who was not-at-all too bright
While the middle-of-the-road conformists
Who hardly cared at all
Selected a representative
Who was very much too tall
And so, these two debated
In the town and in the square
They made extravagant promises
 To all who saw them there
The fanatic promised everything
The conformist did the same
And each was quite assiduous
The other was to blame
For the deplorable condition
Of the world that was before
For the worsening economy
The weather and the war
The tall man said he would not stoop
To call his opponent dumb
While the simpleton insisted
That the worst was yet to come
If his oversized opponent
Turned out to win the race
That he should be elected
 To his true and rightful place
And so, they argued to and fro
As if it were a game
And each did claim the other one
 Was solely in the blame
On the day of the popular election
Lord Hem-and-haw
Made no selection
For he dillied and he dallied
And he finally sniffed his nose
He walked down to the polling place
In time for it to close
But Lord Hem-and-haw
It’s important to note
In the final tabulation
Was elected by the write-in vote  
As the favourite of the nation
He served the public fairly
He’d promised virtually nothing
And delivered that just barely
So, it was soon decided
By unanimous recommendation
To erect a giant statue
To mark that commendation
Construction did ensue
Without consideration
But halted mid-way through the course
On fiscally sound advice
Now there’s a statue of just his horse
And it looks awfully nice
For it depicts a stalwart pose
Children frequently pet its nose
Which has become quite shiny
Although a few of the tourists
Prefer to pet its heiney
That’s what the uniformed curator insists
And who am I to say
When it comes to statue petting
Which is the proper way?
A very elaborate sign
Affixed upon the base
Identifies the equine
As the winner of the race
And so, the famous history
Which followed the popular course
Remains somewhat a mystery
Were we governed by the horse?
Esteemed and noted historians in the interest of accuracy
Have been known to claim a farce
For it wasn’t the horse that ruled you and me
Instead, the horse’s arse