Don't Lose Your
Head
by Brian Barnett
The audience
roared with cheers and whistles. Another
successful trick floored them. Harry Gordon bowed
to acknowledge his audience.
“For my
next trick,” he announced dramatically,
“I will remove my own head.”
The audience
murmured amongst themselves, clamoring in
anticipation. “Impossible,” he heard
one of them whisper to his neighbor.
Harry’s
assistant and wife, Misty Gordon, high-stepped
her way to his side, gracefully. She flashed a
wide smile to the audience while flipping her
hair over her shoulder.
The fog
machine poured a mist onto the stage and the
music boomed overhead. Laser lights flashed
colorful beams diagonally and a fan under the
stage blew Harry’s shirt and hair for extra
theatrics. Harry placed his hands on the sides of
his head and paused to build tension.
With one good
yank, he removed his head and handed it to Misty.
She took it from him and held it high for
everyone to see. She flashed a flirty smile as
she attempted to appear a mysterious as possible.
The audience
gasped and awed over the feat.
Harry’s
hands motioned for her to pass the head back to
him. Misty stumbled and dropped it onto the stage.
It thudded like a ripe melon and rolled awkwardly
to a stop. Harry’s eyes were wide. They
shifted frantically trying to assess the
situation.
“Christ!”
The Harry’s head screamed. Panic began to
set in. The back of his head throbbed.
She ran over
to pick it up, but stumbled in her high hills.
She sprawled out on the stage, inadvertently
bumping the head off the edge. It sailed several
feet and into the audience.
It landed in
the lap of an elderly lady, who immediately
fainted and slumped forward. Her body blocked the
air from the Harry’s head.
His body
panicked. It scrambled around the stage, flailing
his arms wildly. His body could not decide
whether to strangle Misty or find his way to the
audience to sift through them for his head. He
decided to attempt the latter.
The audience
was unsure whether to laugh or panic. Some people
streamed up the isles, while others held their
sides with laughter.
Harry’s
body tumbled off the stage and onto other
audience members. They screamed in panic and
pushed the body into the floor.
Finally Misty
limped to the edge of the stage and slid off. She
pushed the elderly woman up and off of
Harry’s head. He gasped for air amid calling
her names.
She snatched
it out of the elderly woman’s lap and let
her slump forward again. She handed it back to
the Harry’s clamoring hands.
He promptly
fixed it back upon his neck and made his way back
onto the stage, cursing Misty the whole way. She
stormed off the stage, gesturing with her middle
finger as she left.
The remaining
audience members gave a standing ovation. The
magician hesitated. They did not realize the act
was bungled, he thought. He bowed politely and
winked with his good eye and removed a bubblegum
wrapper from his cheek. This could be my new act,
he realized, I better go find Misty.
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