Full Circle
by Tony R. Lindsay
In the
beginning Mother God created the heavens and the
earth. Eon’s drifted by, and Mother God was
content to take long naps and sing in off-key
soprano. Then she designed a simple form of life
and observed as one-cell creatures evolved into
complex fauna.
Mother God
loved to chat, but there were no women around. So,
Mother God created Eve. They lived together in a
lovely garden and babbled daily for millennium.
But Eve became bored and unhappy.
An apple tree
grew in that garden. Mother God took a branch
from the tree and fashioned a toy for Eve in the
image of a one-eyed snake. Eve was pleased, and
for a time, happy. Then Eve became bored again.
Mother God looked with pity upon Eve. She gave a
form of life to the snake, attached Adam to it,
and presented her gift to Eve.
Eve’s
euphoric dancing shredded a portion of the garden.
The blissful
existence for women and men lasted for a time.
Then Eve complained that men had evolved to
become so large and powerful that they threaten
to dominate females.
“Don’t
worry, Eve. Men are stronger than women, but
women are smarter. I planned it that way.
It’s something I call parity.”
At first, men
hunted by simply charging a mammoth or a giant
bear and flailing away with clubs and rocks. Many
men were torn apart or trampled. Over a long span
of time, men learned to hunt by setting traps and
using strategy to bring down their prey. The
planning and execution of schemes resulted in men
developing improved cerebral function. With
brains almost as large as women, and with much
stronger bodies, men exerted dominance over women
for thousands of years. The fair sex resorted to
sly and indirect methods of getting men to behave
in an acceptable manner.
Generations
rolled by and men began to depend upon improved
weapons and to rely less on out-thinking their
quarry. The brains of men reverted back to the
time when they were far less intelligent than
women. A significant portion of the male brain
migrated down his torso, lodging in a lower
appendage.
And so
it came to pass that women reclaimed their
original position as the superior gender. Mother
God looked down upon creation and was pleased to
see that her plan had come full circle.
Almighty
Mother God announced in a wind blown all over the
world, “As it was in the beginning, is now,
and ever shall be, women rule the earth.”
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