Not Quite The
Threesome He Envisioned
by Katie O'Brian-Robles
I took
Sofia into the doggie day spa to get her teeth
cleaned, nails trimmed and a bath. This
constitutes a full day as they do put the girls
into a kind of twilight sleep whilst cleaning
their teeth. I picked her up around three
and the girl was stoned.. BLIND DRUNK.. She
wobbled inside and curled up and passed out on
her bed as she was too toasted to get up on the
sofa. Little by little she came out of it and
when my husband got home, he felt sorry for his
baby and invited her to sleep with us. (The girl
just had too many martinis at the spa and was
woozy, that's all.. but I digress.)
The
Grand Dame jumped up on our bed and and took
her place at the foot like the perfect doberman.
All was well til around three in the morning,
when I found myself hugging the very edge of my
side and Mike doing the same on his own side.
Sofia was sprawled kitty corner snoring like a
freight train.
"Okay,
so this wasn't a good idea," huffed Mike as
he took pillows and comforter down to the sofa,
leaving me with 90 pounds of hung over doberdiva.
"Come
on Sofia, off."
"That's
a good girl, mommy has a liver treat for you...
DOWN."
All
this seems to work perfectly for Cesar Milan and
that Victoria Stillwell whisperer. Not for me.
Her eyes were squinched as tight as possible and
she was doing a great imitation of a dead
dog.
"SOFIA,
OFF THE BED RIGHT NOW AND I REALLY MEAN IT."
I was
ignored..
I tipped
the mattress to kind of let her slide off.. she
clutched the edges with her newly manicured nails
and hung on with all her might. I finally got her
off and as she stood blinking at me I said..
"There that wasn't so bad was it?"
Within
a split second she was back on the bed.. I joined
Mike on the sofa downstairs..
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