The Angry
Vegetarian
by Jerry Guarino
Sam didn’t start out
angry. He didn’t start out as a vegetarian.
This was the culmination of repeated frustration
over a long period of time. It wasn’t even
Sam’s fault; virtually all of the conditions
he had were genetically passed on from his father.
You can’t pick your name or your genetics.
But no one would have guessed how he would react
when faced with the final, insurmountable
obstacle.
After school, Sam would
work in the diner that his father had bought back
in the 1950s. Burgers, fries, sandwiches, blue-plate
specials and the coldest, thickest, most
delicious milk shake in town, nicknamed, the
iceberg. If a customer could drink one with a
straw, the shake was free. At the end of the day,
Sam would sit with his father in a corner booth;
his pop would challenge him to drink a strawberry
shake with a straw. One day, this ritual was
interrupted when a lovely teenage girl came over
to them and questioned Sam’s father.
“Excuse me sir, do you
need any waitresses after school?” Sam kept
one eye on her while continuing his milkshake,
hoping to impress this angel and praying that his
pop would give her a job. Her name was Veronica (very
popular back then). She was 5’9” with
long, light brown hair, horned rimmed glasses and
a beautiful smile. It was the 15-year old Sam’s
first crush.
They worked together for
two years until Sam left for college upstate.
Veronica went to a local college and continued to
work part time in the diner; Sam would come back
to the diner every holiday and break, in order to
see her. For the next three years, he tried to
maintain a connection with her. Then just before
Thanksgiving, Sam’s world changed; his
father died.
He left college and
returned to run the diner. College life seemed
like a vacation now compared to 12-hour days, 7
days a week. At least Veronica was still working
there. He vowed to find the right time to ask for
a date.
It was an unusually busy
morning. Veronica was scurrying around, trying to
keep up. “Sam, we need more pastries out
front. They’re selling like hotcakes. And
table three just ordered four servings of
hotcakes” she said smiling at him. He warmed
up now to the object of his affection. “Right
away Ronnie. Joe, get more pastry from the back
and give them to Ronnie.” Meanwhile Sam
hurriedly made more batter.
Since he had taken over,
business had increased. He could tell from the
inventory and receipts. But what was the reason?
He had maintained his father’s menu, cooking
techniques and advertising, even the staff was
largely the same. Could it be that his presence
gave customers the feeling that the business was
continuing? His father was well liked, but people
could tell he was slowing down before the heart
attack. Such little things can effect people’s
perceptions. Maybe this was a sign that he should
finally pursue his feelings for Veronica?
On a cold day in February,
Sam gave her more attention than usual; Veronica
flirted back. Could all the stars be aligned? Sam
knew that if he was going to ask her out, it
should be now. As they were closing down that
night, he made sure to let the rest of the staff
off first.
He made two milkshakes and
set them in a corner booth, and then went back to
wash his hands. “Ronnie, why don’t you
join me for an iceberg?” She winked, took
Sam’s hand and walked him back to the booth.
Sam knew what he had to do now. “What is
this?” he said, seeing a candle in a heart
shaped muffin between the milk shakes. “It’s
Valentines Day Sam. Don’t you know that I’ve
wanted you to ask me out for years.” Sam
couldn’t believe it. “I’ve felt
the same way. I was always too scared.”
Holding hands in the booth, this was the
beginning of a lifetime of happiness for both of
them. They were married in the summer; Veronica
finished college and then joined Sam full time in
the diner.
But years of diner food
took its toll as Sam developed the same ailments
that his father had succumbed to: high
cholesterol at 40, diabetes at 50 and a kidney
stone at 60. Each diagnosis meant another
restriction on his diet. First cut out fat, then
sugar and finally protein. Sam had become the
angry vegetarian.
Sam thanked God that Ronnie
never had such health problems. Although she
picked up the slack when Sam’s health
declined, keeping up with supply purchases was
always difficult.
It was Valentines Day again.
Ronnie put out two milkshakes and a heart shaped
muffin with candle, just as she had done each
year for 40 years. She took Sam’s hand and
led him to the booth, kissed him on the cheek and
sat him down. She could tell something was wrong.
“Make a wish sweetheart. Anything you want.”
He boiled over like
Yosemite Sam would when confronted with Bugs
Bunny. A slow burn is putting it mildly. “What
would I like? I’ll tell you what I’d
like. I’d like some food, plain old American
food. Nothing fancy, nothing extreme. Just some
wholesome, everyday food.” Sam thought about
how his father died.
Trying to cheer him up,
Veronica pushed the cold, thick strawberry milk
shake in front of Sam. He looked down. “Sweetheart.
This is dirty. Would you mind getting me another
one please?” Veronica gave her best pouty
face, put her hand on Sam’s shoulder and
gave him the bad news. “I’m so sorry
dear. That was the last straw.” Sam laughed.
The
Angry Vegetarian by Jerry Guarino
Copyright February, 2012 – All Rights
Reserved
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