Dialogues Act 2
by Doug Hawley
When the deep purple falls over sleepy
Sally interrupts Duke, youve
been warned about singing. Stop it now.
have any idea what we should do when we cant
cut the mustard anymore?
Duke When it happens to me, I assume that
you will still be OK, because Im halfway
around the bend now. Take me into the woods,
and if I find my way back you have to keep me.
Otherwise Ill try to survive by mugging
squirrels and eating berries.
Sally If it does happen to me first, put me
in a comfy chair and bring me chocolates and
mother hates me.
Sally That is just not true. How can
you say that?
Duke She refers to me the drain clog.
Sally OK, she may not like you much.
Sally I married you. She hates in-laws and
isnt that crazy about family.
do you take your shirt off before going to the
Duke Shittee on shirttail 5 cents extra.
repeatedly clicking Info on the remote Hmm.
Why doesnt this work. Could it be that
the last person to use this didnt hit the
Sally I usually hit the cable button. Why
cant you just hit the cable button?
Duke The person who starts the remote
should just hit all three buttons.
Sally Can we just move on, PLEASE?
do I turn on the laundry?
Sally How did you ever survive as a
Duke It wasnt pretty. I used to use
plates until they were so dirty the food rolled
off. I learned how to use a coin op laundry. I
dont think I ever washed sheets or blankets. My
mother checked in from time to time to see if I
was surviving. I cant remember where my
clothes came from.
the deal that I would buy the car and you would
plan for Backyard Certification?
Duke Didnt we get a car over a year
Sally Im planning on the garden.
turn is it to fill up the pill containers?
Duke I dont even know what I had for
breakfast and that was fifteen minutes ago.
color do you want to paint the house?
Duke Purple with orange racing stripes.
Sally Sigh. Why do I even
you remember our first date?
Sally I vividly remember, we went to see
Butch Cassidy And The Sundance Kid
and then went to the The Midnight Sun
for dinner. It was a great evening.
Duke Apparently your memory is no better
than mine. I invited you over to my
apartment for popcorn and sex. You are right
about it being a great evening. The movie
and dinner wasnt until later in Atlanta.
Sally You lie. I have a mind like a steel
Duke Right. Rusty and filled with dead
about an evening of dining and dancing.
Sally Great idea. Its been a long
time since we have gone out to do anything.
I was thinking of bringing
some MacDonalds home and playing some
Rolling Stones or Little Richard.
Sally Ever the romantic.