| A Visit to the
                Doctor in the Nervous Ninetiesby Vijai Pant
 He is
                having slight congestion in his chest, I
                told the doctor, my soft tone ensuring that dad
                does not hear it. My dad, probably like all dads
                and aged persons, never likes the idea of telling
                the doctor a great deal.  Its
                OK to talk of symptoms, but why go beyond that,
                he would often say. So, hazarding
                a guess about the ailment as a layman is a
                complete No! No! His visit to a
                doctor is as much about getting cured as a litmus
                test of the doctors professional competency. The doctor,
                probably tired at the fag end of the day,
                suppressed a yawn, but my 92 years old dad was
                quick enough to notice it. He gave me an
                admonishing look for having brought him to
                someone who apparently seemed quite disinterested
                in his work, or, specifically in his patients
                well being. The
                examination, with a torch enlightening the dark
                caverns of his toothless mouth, while my dad
                momentarily resembled the male version of Kali,
                with his tongue protruding out, was over in a
                jiffy. Thereafter, the languid movements of the
                stethoscope took over, but unluckily for the
                doctor, this too did not last long enough to
                satisfy my father that the job had been well done.
                Everything seems normal. Just ensure that
                he takes due precaution in this chilly weather.
                And yes, only lukewarm water, the doctor
                concluded, handing me the prescription, the paper,
                more or less unsullied. He added, as an
                afterthought, For his age, your father
                appears extremely fit. However, the way it
                was said the compliment looked more like a
                complaint, an exception to the universally
                accepted rule of old age and infirmity going hand-in-hand.
                It made me wonder whether I should apologise to
                this middle aged pro for bringing to him a ninety
                something man, with all faculties intact.
 The
                prescription, without any medicines, was handed
                over to me. The doctor smiled. It was message for
                us to leave. But dad was not done yet. He stayed
                put. Like any smart
                consumer, he wanted value for money- the
                consultation fee- and value here meant more of
                the doctors time. Doctor,
                why am I having a wheezing sound while breathing,
                he queried. The doctor who
                had already rung the bell for the next patient,
                tried to dismiss the query with, Ive
                explained it to your son, obviously not
                happy with this unexpected hold-up.  But my dad
                seemed in no hurry to leave. Its
                nothing. It happens in old age. Dont worry.
                Youll be all right, the doctor coaxed
                wanting to get rid of him. You mean
                to say all old people have it and that too
                without any reason, father was not liking
                the fact that knowledge was not being shared. Well!
                You can say that, the doctor retorted
                completely exasperated at the whole thing. Please
                take him away, he almost pleaded with me. I forced dad
                to get up and with a disgruntled look he left the
                doctors chamber, muttering. Although he
                grumbled all the way home and chided me for
                wasting time, energy and money, I was happy
                inside that there was no major health issue.  More than my
                father it is me who gets panicky and worried due
                to his being in the nervous nineties, because
                after all a century is a century. |