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Tiffany
by Laura Solomon and Kerryn Young

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Sammy picked me up at the pub one Saturday night. It wasn’t love at first sight but there was something different about him. Maybe it was the tattoos. He didn’t act like most guys so I was intrigued. He sure had one hell of an ego. He thought he was fantastic between the sheets but between you me and the gatepost he didn’t seem to have much experience and many was the time I went away unsatisfied. I don’t think he realized that making love involves two people – he was selfish and lazy; as long as he got his rocks off he was happy. So why was I with him? It was the Harley that did it for me. Such a beautiful bike? So sleek, so powerful, such thrust in the engine and the speed! I was often on the back of the bike. Sammy would break the red lights and I would have kittens, but it gave me a thrill too.

I didn’t know where Sammy had come from. He didn’t talk at all about his past. I wondered if he had been a criminal. It was as if he’d just appeared from thin air; I’d never seen him round in the pub before and I knew almost everybody in our neck of the woods. God he was a bludger. Didn’t work, didn’t even try to find a job, didn’t know what CV meant – just sat around smoking, drinking and playing air guitar all day. One time I caught him at it and he was dead embarrassed. I hooked him up with an apartment to get him out of my house, out of my hair. My Dad’s loaded, sends me monthly payments for my hairdressing business. I specialize in eighties perms.

He used to have weird dreams and mumble in his sleep like he was talking to somebody and one time I heard him say something about his socks. The relationship didn’t last long. Things ended tragically. We were fighting about the money I give him and I accused him of being a bludger. Of course I feel real guilty about it now that he’s gone. He took off on his bike in a mood – raced away with a screech of tyres and a fag in his mouth.

Half an hour later, the cops came knocking at the door and I ran around hiding Sammy’s drugs but when I answered it turns out they were just there to break some terrible news.

“Do you know Sammy?”

Nobody knew his last name. I don’t think he had one.

“Yes”, I said. “He is my boyfriend. What’s he done now?”

“I’m afraid there’s been an accident. Sammy hit a logging truck this afternoon. He’s no longer with us.” I burst into tears – couldn’t help myself. God I’m gonna miss that Harley.

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