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A Man of a Few More Words - by Swan Morrison

The Sťance

‘The lights have been extinguished. We have linked hands to form an unbroken circle around this table, and we are ready to commence the sťance… Is there anybody there?’

‘Cor blimey, you frightened the life out o’ me. I fort the ‘owse was empty!’

‘Ah, a soul is communicating!’

‘I don’t want no trubble, misses. The lites was off - I fort everyone ‘ad gone owt. I’ll be on me way.’

‘Remain, shy vision. Have you come from the other side?’

‘I come from the uvver side o’ the kitchin’ winda, if that’s wot yer mean.’

‘I understand – you are a roving spirit. What has brought you to this house tonight?’

‘I was afta the video.’

‘How wonderful! I feel quite faint with excitement. Never before has a visitor from the other side sought material possessions. You must take it to the hidden world with our blessings.’

‘Er… thanks misses, that’s really generus.’

‘I see you take the form of a beam of light?’

‘That’s me flashlight, misses… Ah, I can see the video…’

‘What a curious term for an embodiment of a soul.’

‘Rite, I’ve got it - I’ll be off now.’

‘Please stay and enlighten us further. Do you have a name?’

‘I don't usually tell that to ‘ouseolders.’

‘Your otherworldly secrets are safe with us. We have sworn oaths!’

‘It’s Eric. Me mates call me Fingers.’

‘May we call you the same?’

‘If yer like.’

‘What else do you seek here, Mr Fingers?’

‘Whateva’s abowt. Cash is always 'andy – or jewlrey.’

‘Remarkable! There is cash and jewellery in the drawers behind you – please take it.’

‘Er…ta.’

‘Friends, I believe we are witnessing the greatest moment in spiritualist history!’

‘Fanks for awl this, misses. I’d betta be goin’ now. Me mate, George, is outside wiv the engin' runnin’. He’ll be finkin’ I’ve bin nicked.’

‘Depart, Mr Fingers, with our best wishes. Have you any final advice for those on this side?’

‘I fink you shud keep yer windas shut when the ‘owse looks empty.’

‘Many thank, Mr Fingers, and farewell...
Let us take a moment for the link with the other world to close... Now, I shall turn on the lights… Yes, yes, it is just as I had dared to hope - the video is gone, as are the other possessions - we have joined with the other side in material and fiscal communion!
Once again, our meeting has broken new ground in communication with the forbidden world.
You will all remember the early morning gathering, sunlight obscured by heavy curtains, when milk was delivered from the world beyond!
You will also recall the afternoon meeting, frequented by the presences of utility meter readers!
We must next meet on a Sunday morning, when normal people remain in bed, and attempt to experience manifestations of Jehovah’s Witnesses!
But for now, we must go. The residents of this property will shortly return, and the police will soon be summoned to investigate the thefts.
We must, sadly, return to our ethereal realm. We can, however, take solace from another wonderful, though fleeting, encounter with the living.’