Deadly Dead
Thieves
by Amit
Parmessur
Muscular. Popular.
Married. This is how I can describe Mr Fong Tog
Pinnng, my new neighbour. Obviously, his name
bothers me most. Foolish people affirm that his
parents were so confused about naming him that
they dropped a vase to the floor and named him
after the sounds produced.
It’s been two
months since he’s taken the dead
butcher’s empty house. His father being
atrociously wealthy Mr Fong Tog Pinnng
turned the butcher’s ground floor into an
attractive shop. Personally I’m not too
close to him but I can feel for him as nowadays
he’s a miserable shopkeeper. He’s
spending most of his time convincing the cops
that he’s been victim to the shrewdest gang
of thieves.
It’s not that
I don’t want to help the police and my
neighbour. It’s just that I don’t want
to be sent to the asylum and leave my extremely
beautiful wife alone in this cruel, selfish and
materialistic world. Who would believe me, anyway?
It’s all
about a week ago. I was coming back from work
very late and was the only soul on the streets as
I drove quickly but carefully, with my extremely
beautiful wife waiting for me. It was past
midnight. While entering my house I heard an odd
noise. I quietly hid behind a tree and heard the
noise once again from Mr Fong Tog
Pinnng’s house.
Gathering my wits,
and with the help of the moon I saw the whole
stock of cigarettes being stolen. I think the
thief was none other than old Uncle Jerry, the
heavy smoker. Behind him was his son, the heavy
drinker, with all the wine trudging away. I
panicked.
Then I guess I saw
Aunt Margaret, the avid chicken eater. Eleven
bags stuffed with frozen chicken were flying away!
Poor Fong Tog Pinnng. I thought it was
all over when I saw another line of thieves
parading mutely.
Juvenile
delinquency.
One had his hands,
pockets and mouth full of biscuits. Another
seemed a fan of Doritos as the whole
stock was moving out with him. The next had one
hand full of chocolates and the other overloaded
with sweets. In spite of the tight security it
was another clever sweeping of goods from Mr Fong
Tog Pinnng’s shop the following
night.
As you have
guessed Uncle Jerry and Co are dead. It was just
the days all dead would roam free. 1. Being the
sole eye-witness. 2. Going to court night and day.
3. Testifying against the dead! 4. Leaving my
extremely beautiful wife in this cruel,
materialistic and selfish world. Too much.
Much too much.
Mr Fong Tog
Pinnng’s father is the sole undertaker in
town and makes his profits in a very dishonest
way. Mr Fong Tog Pinnng is surely paying
for the deeds of his father and the dead are just
having their private revenge for being
fraudulently manhandled into their graves. I only
know my silence will help preserve my extremely
beautiful wife. I can’t speak.
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