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Tell You What I'm Gonna Do
by Michael A. Kechula

“Hey, Kid, give it a try. Ten chances for a dollar. Toss a ping-pong ball in the basket. If it stays in, you win the best prizes on the Midway.”

“But your shelves are empty. Where are the prizes?”

“In your head.”

“Whadda ya mean?”

“If you win, you get whatever you want. Name it, and you got it. But you gotta tell me within one second after the ball settles in the basket. If you take longer, you lose.”

“I bet if I win and say Mustang convertible, you’ll give me a little toy car.”

“No way. See all those trailers parked over there? They’re loaded with prizes. New cars. Designer clothes. Gold jewelry. Anything a teenager like you could ever want. You name it, I got it.”

“You’re kidding.”

“Nope. See that gal in the tight red jeans at the hot dog stand? She won a solid-gold watch a few minutes ago. Ask her to show it to you.”

“Excuse me, Lady. The guy over there said you won a gold watch from him. Is that true?”

“Yep. Look at this beauty. I’ll bet it’s worth ten thousand bucks. I won it on my eighth try.”

“Wow! I’m gonna go back there and see if I can win a car.”

“Good luck,” she said.

“I see you’re back. How many balls do you want?”


“Here you go. Good luck.”

“Hey! I won!”

“Forfeit,” he said. “You didn’t name your prize within a second.”

“Aw hell. Well, watch closely, because I’m gonna win again. Yahoo. BUBBLE GUM!”

“We got a winaaaa! Here’s a piece of bubble gum, Kid. Chew it in good health.” 

“Wait. Something weird just happened. I was gonna say Mustang convertible, but somehow I ended up saying bubble gum. That sure as hell ain’t gonna happen again. Gimme ten more balls.”

“Here you go. Good luck. Hey, don’t lean over the counter like that. It’s against the rules.”

“Sorry.  Okay…watch this. PLASTIC COMB!

“We got a winaaaa! You’re a very lucky kid. Here’s a nice comb for your curly hair.”

“Dammit! It happened again. I don’t know why I said plastic comb instead of Mustang convertible.”     

“You must be over excited. Tell you what I’m gonna do. Next time you win, I’ll name the prize for you.”


“I swear. What color convertible do you want?

“Candy apple red.”

“Okay, Kid. Win again, and I'll name it for you.”

“Damn. I can’t seem to get any balls in the basket.”

“Maybe you’ll get lucky with the next one.”

“Hey! I won!”

“Your immortal soul,” he said

“What? You were supposta say Mustang convertible.”

“Sorry. My mistake. Tell you what I’m gonna do. Whadda ya say we make a trade. I’ll give you a Mustang convertible right now for your immortal soul.”

“What's that?”

“Nothing compared to a beautiful new car. Think of all the hot chicks you’ll be able to pickup. Is it a deal?”

“Hell yeah.”

“We got another winaaaa!”