Smart Car
by Doug Hawley
14: Autodidact
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I asked Deuce what we
should do if we ever saw Mower Arty. Deuce said
we should chase him down, not only because he was
a killer, but because Mower Arty embarrassed all
unreformed vehicles such as himself. Deuce said
“If we don’t catch him, no one will.
The police with their smart cars could never keep
up with him. No one other than us has the ability
to stop him.”
I took Deuce out for a drive by myself for a
change from my usual smart car ride Carl/a.
Sheila had taught me to appreciate driving rather
than just riding. It was invigorating to be in
charge of the controls and I wanted to clear my
mind about my relationship with Sheila.
We went out the old Columbia River Highway to
catch some of the beautiful mountain and
waterfall scenery.
News item - Something happened today that hasn’t
happened for at least twenty years. Witnesses say
a high speed car chase took place in Norbit
Oregon on the old Columbia River Highway. Jason
Atkins filmed part of the chase before it turned
down Marchand Road. Matching the film to archives
indicates that one of the vehicles was a 1969
Dodge Charger and the other was a garishly
painted 1969 Mustang. The latter is known to be
the vehicle of Mower Arty, so called because he
has mowed down pedestrians and has pornographic
art on the sides of the car.
Investigators at the end of Marchand Road found
that the fence around Rightinback Falls had been
knocked down and no sign of either car. It is
assumed that both cars ended up in the Columbia
River.
News item a week later – Mortimer Snodgrass
in his 1969 Ford Mustang was found washed down
the Columbia River from Norbit Oregon to Gresham
Oregon. An autopsy has yet to be performed.
Snodgrass, a thirty-five year old accountant, has
been revealed to be the notorious killer Mower
Arty. So far nothing has been found of the other
car rumored to have gone over Rightinback Falls
while in pursuit of Mower Arty.
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